Showing posts with label sad. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sad. Show all posts

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Young Hearts

A poem about learning to love, coping with loss and grief and standing on your own feet again after growing and maturing...

~~~

"Young Hearts"

How fragile the heart can be in early days.
Nothing is what it seems and all is covered by a haze.

We trust and we become untrustworthy in an attempt to love.
We run and chase until we fall, being forced to look up above.

How terrible it is to take hold of something we desire but cannot keep.
How defeated our hearts feel when sinking so very deep.

One must taste the bitterness of failure before rising once more.
Being strong is our hope when we're unsure of what to fight for.

We're all lost souls, wandering through a life that feels like a dream.
Be cautious when showing your affection, for things are not always what they seem.

See, even a darling little girl could have a plan for your demise...
And, maybe the scary beast in the forest is really just an angel in disguise!

Do not let your heart wander away on a path of false hope.
Escape the chains of forgetfulness and learn how to cope.

Fall asleep with dreams of happiness in your mind.
The clock of time never stops to reset or to rewind.

The breeze runs its long fingers through your hair,
Whispering its secrets and its lonely despair.

All the time in the world belongs to you right here and now.
Learn the best way to spend it and try to teach others how.

        
           Copyright Casandra Camp 2012  

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Someone

Each poem I write has a meaning behind it. This is piece definitely meaningful. I wrote it for a few particular people in my life (whom I will not mention by name). These people test me and my patience, but I love them too much to sit back and watch them destroy themselves day by day. However, like I say in the writing below... I can only do so much before I say "I can do no more".
~~~

"Someone" 

Look into the mirror and see what we all clearly see.
Selfish, prideful and uncaring... that's who you've come to be. 

Life is more than indulging in yourself and using others just for fun.
Take hold of yourself and look within your heart; you'll see your journey has only begun. 

Take time to love and time to reflect.
Without doing these things... you'll soon lose all respect. 

Can't you just put your old ways to rest?
Can't you see it's for the best? 

I don't wanna watch you die.
I'll turn away before I cry. 

There's only so much I can do before I say "I can do no more".
Changing might become easier when you're left alone and when everyone walks out the door. 

I wish you knew how precious your life is to me.
I don't wanna leave your side or ever become your enemy. 

I'm getting tired of holding the hand of someone who pushes me away.
It's hard to go... but it's even harder to stay. 

Wake me when you realize what's right and what's wrong.
Until then, I'll be elsewhere and will be hoping I don't have to wait too long.

Copyright Casandra Camp 2010

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Lost and Lonely

A lot of my poems have a theme about them, I've noticed. They're greatly influenced by the feelings I have during the moment that I decide to write. Most are very melancholy, as I'm sure most people can see.
Writing has become a great outlet for me and it's encouraged a lot of other artistic abilities to surface. I'm grateful for these feelings, however lonely they may be. They're helping me to become a stronger person with each release.

~~~

"Lost and Lonely"

Watch me as I sleep. Keep me safe from the storm.
Can't you feel my body shaking? Won't you keep me warm?

I hear the thunder far away, ever growing near.
Don't wake me as I lay here dreaming. It's only reality I fear.

Look into my eyes and take my lifeless hand.
This moment will soon be gone. Lost forever like a grain of sand.

The clouds form around me and I forget where I'm going.
In which place can I find the knowledge of the knowing?

A hungry soul and a tortured mind,
This life hasn't been easy... and it certainly hasn't been kind.

Oh, please take me away. I long to go where I cannot, at the moment, see.
I suppose I'll just have to wait though. Wait for someone to set me free.

Fragile and fading is the dream within my heart.
Confused and unsure, but never completely apart.

Hold me and tell me all the things I need to hear.
Whisper that you love me and that you'll always be near.

Talking to these shadows and running my hand along the wall,
I do believe I've gone insane... but who, to help me, can I call?

Humming an old tune and simply lying on the ground,
I wait and wait, for eternity, hoping to be found.



Copyright Casandra Camp 2010


Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Thinking of Me, Thinking of You

This wasn't written for any particular reason or with any particular person in mind. It's really just another one of my lonely and heartfelt tales with little hints of self-reflection and personal confession.
~~~
"Thinking of Me, Thinking of You" 

Cold and alone, I lay here without much feeling.
I wait, hope and pray for strength and for healing.


I do not hear with my ears, nor do I see with my eyes.

My heart and soul do everything now, seeing as how my body only cries.


I need to feel again. I need to brought back to life.

Telling me you love me, and not meaning it, is the same as stabbing me wit
h a knife!

Maybe it won't be like this for too much longer... maybe I'll be okay.

I'm just sitting here, waiting, for someone to come and to stay.


Don't tell me only what I want to hear... tell me the truth 'cause I'm tired of lies.

People that are untrue and unfaithful; those are the people I despise.

 
I'm not like the others and yet I feel the same.
Is there anyone out there that can hear my voice, anyone who knows my name?


The person you see on the outside isn't me at all.

The real me is hidden, it is not of this world; this world that is so very small.


Although I've been cheated and regardless of the fact that I am broken,

My life must go on and I must hear the words that, from my heart, are spoken.

Imperfect and flawed, that's who I am and who I will always b
e.
Is it too much to want someone to love and to care for me?


I rest my head and I shut my eyes in a desperate attempt to go to sleep.
My prayer isn't just to survive or for Him, my soul, to keep.


I know I'm not the only one and that life must go on...
However, I feel an emptiness that cuts me deep down; all the way to my bone.


I'm not what I seem and I'm not who you think
.
Drowning in an ocean of memories, I will forever continue to sink.


Not really knowing who I am or what to do,

I'm still here in your mind, thinking of me... and me, thinking of you.

 
Copyright Casandra Camp 2010

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Open Door

"Open Door"

I open my eyes and look around.
I expose my soul and listen to its sound.

Everything is different now.
I don't know why, I don't even know how.

Sometimes it seems like I'm dreaming and that I'm not "me" at all.
I'm being careful not to stumble, I'm being careful not to fall.

So much confusion and frustration abound.
I take myself away from it all and in emptiness I surround.

The lights grow ever dim and the hands on the clock spin.
This life is so brutal, sometimes it seems that you can never win.

Time and effort; two things that will always devour the human race.
These things can be wasted simply by looking too intently at someone's face.

Deep feelings and true concern continue to ruin me.
The reasons behind what I do, people always fail to see.

Giving up and letting go is something that's always easier to do.
However, having faith and being wise is something that will pull you through.

I won't settle until I find what I'm looking for.
All I need now is the courage to free my spirit and open the door...



Copyright Casandra Camp 2010

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Smiling Faces

Short poem I wrote today. This one isn't really all that different when compared to my older ones. It's about loneliness and the strange, terrible feeling you get when faced with a world full of people that expect entirely too much of you. We live in a place where you either have to "Face it or Fake it" to make it through the day.

~~~


"Smiling Faces"

As the wind blows and the shadows dance,
There, in the corner, sits a girl who knows not the meaning of "romance".

She's never heard the word "love" and been able to truly understand,
Her soul is incapable of trusting someone who offers her their hand.

The night smothers her in loneliness and her tiny body aches,
Her dreams are filled with horror, dreams of death and of earthquakes.

Walking blindly into danger, she's done it way too many times before,
Always having regrets and failing to see life as anything other than a "chore".

Surrounded by fake people, shining brightly with smiling faces,
She can't help but wonder if they, in their lives, are dealing with similar cases.

Everything in her life that was once magical and real,
Has no value and has been thrown away, yet her secrets she plans to forever conceal.

Flashbacks and daydreams are an unhealthy combination for a person such as this,
This person with a memory of words and of actions, this person who is so frequently dismissed.

She doesn't beg or ask for your pity, she doesn't want those things at all,
She only asks that have mercy and that you respect her, crying out to you, she calls.

Refuge she takes in the strangest of places,
Just as long as she can get away from all of those people and their smiling faces...


Copyright Casandra Camp 2010

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Dreams of Nightmares

Another poem (or short story, in this case) I wrote about my frequent dreams and nightmares.

~~~

"Dreams of Nightmares"

Staring into the darkness as I try to sleep,
While wishing and wondering, my sanity I try to keep.

After hours of tossing and turning,
I close my eyes to stop their burning.

I start to hear voices whispering in my ear,
I ask "Who's there," but nothing do I hear.

My heart beats fast and I feel cold,
Try as I may, I cannot be bold.

I tell myself "You're dreaming,"
Only, as I say those things, I hear someone screaming.

Everything around me flashes and fades away,
All that's left now is me and my dismay.

Terror sweeps over me as I look all around,
I say "Hello," but no one is to be found.

I can still hear the voices and I still feel cold,
"This can't be happening," I whisper as the night gets old.

Blow after blow comes from invisible sources,
I try as hard as I can to I fight back at these forces.

Just when I feel I can take no more,
A hand reaches down and opens a door.

I limp to the exit, nearer to death than I've ever been before,
I hear lightening strike and I fall down to the floor.

My eyes are closed and my body frozen,
But something snatches me from the death that was thought to be chosen.

I fell down through a deep tunnel without much care,
I opened my eyes and inhaled, gasping for air.

Next thing I know, I'm back in my bed,
I sat up slowly and touched my head.

All along, I thought I was, somehow, in reality,
But every night, my nightmares end up getting the best of me.

I wrap myself up and try to stop shivering,
My teeth chatter and my hands refuse to cease their quivering.

The voices stop and my heart slows down,
But just as this happens, I see the sun and make a frown.

My whole night was spent in terror and in vain,
My body aches and I wish I could escape the pain.

My dreams used to be filled with laughter and of fun,
But now, I fear, my horrors have just begun.

I do not know why things happen the way they do,
I know I'm not alone and that you dream, too.

Hiding away, I lock the doors and pray,
Someday soon, peace will come to me and stay.

When I go to bed tonight, I'm sure I'll dream some more,
I only hope that it's of things that don't shake me to my core!

Copyright Casandra Camp 2010



Monday, April 26, 2010

Recent poetry

I plan to enter these in the upcoming County Fair that my town hosts. I live in a small town with few writers, so hopefully my poems will get good reviews!

"Reflections of Fallen Kingdoms"

I used to be a queen, I used to have a crown,
but now you've run away and have left me feeling down.

I've spent many a night, fighting to erase the images of your face,
but never can I forget the feeling of your embrace.

You tell me all the things that every girl wants to hear,
but when I think of your broken promises, I always shed a tear.

I trusted you when you told me you wanted me to be your wife,
but now I'm alone and all that remains is strife.

Don't ask me why I still love you, I have plenty of reasons to hate,
but since God's telling me to, I plan to always wait.

You've lost something irreplaceable, therefore I know you'll suffer with much pain,
on your darkest night, I hope you see my ghost as it stands out in the rain.

I do not plan on seeking revenge,
however I do know that your time of joy will soon come to an end.

As you lie to her and repeat all the things you once said to me,
I hope she can find a way to escape the greatest agony.

Your future looks dull because of the things that have been done,
only sincerity and redemption can stop what you've begun.

You no longer love me, this I've come to accept,
but whenever you remember how much I cared for you, I hope you question your "logical" concept.

I feel like I've been hurt beyond repair,
but I just thank God that even though you're gone, HE'S still there.

Copyright Casandra Camp 2010




"Royalty in Reserve"

Fellow royalty, take heart and be wise,
sometimes your enemy will be in disguise.

Don't let the thief take your crown or your throne,
for he will lie to you until he can call what's rightfully yours "his own".

He may seem innocent and sweet at first,
but he will stop at nothing to make you feel your worst.

He will bow before you and kiss your feet,
but will laugh at you, hurt you and refuse retreat.

Charmed you may be by his magic and his voice,
but soon you will regret your unlikely choice.

Do not open your door when he comes and knocks,
be sure to instead tie your windows and check the locks.

This boy I speak of is no man,
he is a child of deceit and will lie to you if he can.

I know these things, have seen them and have come to warn,
because I've seen his destruction, I advise you, when he comes, to scorn.

Do not harm him in any way except his pride,
the best way to do this is to never, ever be snide.

Show this child everything he cannot be,
make him say, "Why on earth do they care for ME?"

Pray for him and show him his options,
but know in your heart that only God can stop him.

The Lord created this person with a plan and a purpose,
however, He will not let him continue to intentionally hurt us.

Be careful and know you're not alone in your fight,
the Lord sees everything and knows what you need to make it through each night.

Do not settle for anything less than what you deserve,
you are, after all, royalty in reserve.

Copyright Casandra Camp 2010




"Where It Began"

I cannot find my heart. Where, oh where has it gone?
I look but do not touch because I'm afraid to be alone.

What if the next person leaves me after telling me loads of lies?
Will I be smart enough to see the demon in his cleverest disguise?

The darkness creeps up on me and holds me in it's tightest grasp.
I sit in the shadows, waiting, how long will this nightmare last?

"Go away," I scream with all my might and power.
Forever, this seems... though it's only been an hour.

It's as if I've died and am watching someone else's life from above.
What happened and how will I find my one, real, true love?

I cried out with my whole heart and said, "I love and I need you."
But in all your pride and arrogance, you couldn't say "I love you, too."

I often wonder, now that I'm alone, "Why the heck did I even bother?"
My children, when they are born, will be glad that you're not their father.

I'm cold... but no longer reach for your hand.
You instead turn away and now I understand.

You're not good enough, you said it a million times, a million ways.
I'm looking for the one whose love won't leave, but instead always stays.

"Wake me from this dream," I pray each and every night.
Soon though, I know I'll get my wings and take flight.

Every bit of trust I once had is now history.
Why it had to be this way is nothing but a mystery.

I fell down, down, down; into the deepest pit.
My body aches all over. Oh what must I have hit?

I feel so confused and frustrated by all of this.
It's as if I'm not myself... is there something I could have missed?

The moon goes down and the sun comes up.
All that's left of my feast is now a single, empty cup.

My tears are black and streaked, too many I cry each day.
It won't be like this forever and I refuse to fade away.

Don't tell me you care if, in truth, you don't at all.
I've climbed up to the top and you will not make me fall.

Some may call it silly, but I know it's what I must do.
I'm hiding my feelings away, but maybe, one day, they'll reach out to you.

I have so much to say, yet I say nothing whatsoever.
I can keep you guessing from now until the end of forever.

My heart is still missing, but maybe someone will, one day, return it to me.
And when that someone comes, I pray that he'll be everything he needs to be.

I'm really trying to be smart and keep my wits about.
All in all, I have to say though, it's very hard not to doubt.

I put my hand on my heart and felt it beating inside.
In the face of death I whispered, "No. You, my friend, are the one I've defied."

My time is not yet over, try and catch me if you can.
For this is not the end, but only where it began...

Copyright Casandra Camp 2010